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Sideline Guidelines
Coaches need to establish
sideline guidelines prior to the first game. Be sure all players, parents,
and team managers understand all the sideline guidelines you have
established for your sidelines. Below are some guidelines I have
established with teams: 
Parents do not coach
from the sidelines. Players should be allowed to think on their own
and not worry about disappointing their parents or being embarrassed
by parents!
No yelling at
referees! Behave professionally!
Parents, players, and
coaches should behave in a respectful manner at all time. Keep
yourself in check during emotional times, especially during emotional
moments, joyous or not so joyous!
Cheer for all the
players and never criticize! Parents should be careful not to over do
it when praising their own child. Less is best, from the sidelines!
Parents should tactfully praise children of other parents form the
sidelines!
Players on the bench,
should sit
together in an area next to the coach and pay close attention to the
game. Players need to be aware of the various intricacies of the game,
study the playing style of the opponents, learn from their
observations, and be prepared when they are substituted into the game.
Occasionally, players should warm up and stretch in close proximity of
the coach, especially after they are notified they will be entering
the game.
Players have water
with them on the sidelines and shade on hot/sunny days.
Sideline Rules of
Conduct:
Rule 1: Thou Shalt Not
Praise Thy Own Daughter.
It is the late in the
second half of a vital game and the score is tied against the arch-villain
traditional enemies. Your daughter performs a full speed sliding tackle to
strip the ball from an attacker who eluded the keeper 3 feet in front of
the goal. She does a "pop-up" slide and comes to her feet
without ever losing the ball. Juking and faking, she takes a run up the
touchline, leaving opponents sprawling in her wake and then, sensing that
the whistle is about to blow, hits an off-foot shot from 35 yards that
starts out 20 yards wide and hooks back just into the upper "V"
to win the game. Your reaction? A pleased smile. A little leap no more
than 4 inches off the ground. No cries of "Where is Anson Dorrance
when we really need him?" No matter your intent, shoveling plaudits
on your own kid is seen as basically self-promotion, selfish, and
destructive of team unity. Other parents will mutter darkly and cast
jealous glances at you.
Rule 2: Thou Shalt Praise
Other Parents’ Daughters.
The reason that you don’t
have to praise your own daughter is that it is the sworn duty of the other
parents to do it for you. In situation #1 they will give you high-fives,
hug you, and generally declare that the spirit of Pele (or Mia Hamm) is
being channeled by your child. When someone else’s little girl does
anything ranging from mediocre to spectacular you will run up to them with
similar comments, assuring them that international stardom is only a short
time away, and that this is proof that the gene pool runs true. When
another girl does something appallingly awful you are duty-bound to rush
to the grieving parent to assure them that it wasn’t that bad, and that
she’s been having such a good game she can be forgiven one little goof
Rule 3: Thou Shalt Never
Criticize Players in Public.
The coach has done it
again. Starting at striker is a girl who is slower than America OnLine,
completely clueless about the tactical niceties of her position, and to
whom "airhead" would have to be considered a compliment. You see
the opposing team laughing and pointing. You groan in what you think is a
quiet voice "How can he even keep that dolt on the team". Your
feet leave the ground as you discover that the hulking behemoth behind you
is her Uncle/Brother whom you had never met.
It's usually a given that
the players are trying as hard as they can with differing amounts of
skill. Desirable as a "skillectomy" might be, the ability to
trap a line drive and drop it on the shooting foot cannot be grafted on or
surgically attached. Secondly, players are quite aware when they have made
a bonehead play. You will rarely hear a player shout "Thanks guys, I
didn’t realize that whiffing was a bad thing!" Thirdly, even at the
U-18 level these are still our kids - not professionals - and even the
pros make mistakes. The pros are paid to be able to take criticism as
aimed at their play rather than themselves as persons. Your daughters aren’t.
Rule 4: When Commenting
about the Field Action, Silence is Golden.
At times you may feel
like commenting upon the quality of play, the quality of officiating, and
the coaches’ decisions. Due to your years of observing from the
sidelines and the fact that you coached the "Sunflowers" in the
U-8 rec league you may have the belief that your opinions are (1)
accurate, (2) incisive; and (3) worthy of communicating loudly so everyone
else can hear them. You are wrong. Neither the players, the referees, nor
the coach are going to make any changes in response to your bellows from
the sideline. They are, however, going to be mad at you - joining a group
including your spouse, your friends, and anyone standing close to you.
Kids goof, refs goof, coaches goof. Before you shout, picture your next
day at work as you are working on a project and in the doorway to your
office are a crowd of players, coaches and refs booing you and demanding
that you be fired.
Rule 5: Silence Can Be
Deadly.
The usual response to
your sideline comments is a tug on your shirt from your spouse, a glare,
rolling of eyes by your neighbors, and a silent promise by your daughter
to change her name and become an orphan. However, there are those times
when your comments result in a sudden pall of silence and your becoming
the center of attention from the sidelines and the field. Sort of like in
4th grade when you fell asleep in class and made a funny sound when you
startled awake. This means you have Crossed The Line from being an
obnoxious parent/fan to another status entirely - such as the Unknown
Brother at a U-16 Regional game making anatomically uncomfortable
suggestions about where a referee’s un-blown whistle should reside. When
silence falls and you are the focus of everyone’s attention it may be
time to announce that you are overdue at the hospital to perform a
lifesaving operation and to slink away at top speed.
Rule 6: This Is Still a
Game.
Despite the fact that
each player’s family has invested a great deal of time and money in
soccer at this level, and they are hoping that soccer will help pay the
college bills, it is still a game and if your daughter doesn’t enjoy it
she will not play well - and maybe not at all. Ask yourself if what you do
at games and practices and tournaments helps your daughter have fun and
enjoy the game or adds pressure and worry. Ask yourself after the game if
watching two teams of beautiful, talented, fit, and eager young ladies was
fun for you? If it wasn’t - if you found yourself criticizing, carping,
upset, and unhappy - remember that there is enough pressure and stress
involved with making a living and guiding your family through the
challenges of modern life. Forget the calls, forget the score, forget the
standings. Give your daughter a hug, tell her you love her, and be
thankful for every day you have to share with her because they don’t
stay kids very long.
The preceding 6 rule
sideline guidelines is an excerpt from the FC Royals newsletter, as found
at: http://www.decatursports.com/articles/sideline_rules_of_conduct.htm
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